"Why are my eyes filling up with these lonely tears" - Wreckless Eric

It was cold and I was in a hurry to get to my next class. I don't know why but for some reason I got to thinking about Darwin and his idea of natural selection. And I realized that human beings are pretty much the only species that don't follow that evolutionary law. In fact, we do everything we can to save even the least of all human beings. Those that are born with all their internal organs on the outside even have a chance where, quite frankly, had that happened to a deer in the wild, it would have been dead immediately. No, we are different. Everyone has a chance. And then I saw him. That poor boy walking out of the math building. He was skinny, his left shoulder jutted out farther than his right, his head hung over his right collar bone, which you couldn't see because his shirt was also hanging on him crookedly. He had his backpack on and what I thought was him just nodding his head weird turned out to be a birth defect. When I got closer I realized the left side of his face was puffed out, and his eye was swollen and his mouth pressed shut as if he was holding himself back from yelling. I felt bad for the guy. I wanted to give him a hug. And then I realized this guy probably didn't have much of a chance of surviving, at least with Darwin's definition.

Valentines Day is on saturday and I am so sick of the commercials and the red and the white and the excessive amount of PDA all of a sudden. Every year I am reminded of how single I am. And every year I do something to avoid that realization. I think my favorite something was when Tresa and I tried to trash Nate's car, only to be busted by the cops, only to be told that it was not registered to a so-called Nate, and that in fact we had trashed the wrong neighbor's car. Thank goodness Celtic's Jacket was in one of my classes and we could laugh about it.

I ran out of gas on Friday coming back from night skiing at Brighton. It was an adventure I'll never forget. And the couple that rescued us had 2 random connections to me and Alex. No where but the state of Utah can you be picked up by total strangers and they know someone you know, I'm convinced.

I think I am starting to get good at my job because on Saturday I taught a kid how to ski while playing Star Wars. As Marth Vader, I seriously forgot I was teaching him, Yoda, how to ski because I was too caught up trying to blast with him my lightning and dodging his lightning. And when I got tipped, I thought to myself that had to have been the easiest fifteen dollars I've ever made. I get paid to imaginate, people.

I finally saw Donnie Darko. Dylan, I saw it for you, man. All through high school you told me what an amazing movie it is, and how I needed to see it. I realize now that you somewhat personify Donnie and Frank. I feel like I understand you a little better now. You should know it's on my top 10 favorites list.

...which I shall delineate now. I feel a little intimidated by the numbers, so I will just ramble 10 movies, in no particular order. Really.
A League of Their Own - this movie is incredible. The whole cast is amazing, especially Tom Hanks, and every time I got sick as a kid my dad would ask me what movie I wanted him to rent for me, and I would always always always request this one. This is my comfort movie, and will forever remind me of the compassion my dad showed me as a kid. Maybe that sounds cheesy, but it's the truth.
Fight Club - holy crap have you seen Brad Pitt's body in this movie? If that wasn't enough, Chuck Palahnuik is an amazing writer and consequently so is this well done on-screen adaptation. Thank's Chuck. And Brad.
Donnie Darko - just saw this movie last night, and it's already made it to the list. How is this possible? If you know anything about me, you'd know I am pretty morbid. This movie is the daughter of morbidity. Creepy, artsy, meaningful, references cool literature and other interesting pieces of work...well done.
Harold and Maude - if Donnie Darko is the daughter of morbidity, this movie is The Grandfather. Gross and hysterical put to the sounds of Cat Stevens.
For Love or Money - this is the second movie I would always always always request from my dad as a kid when I'd get sick. I remember being obsessed with intricate things as a kid, and to some extent, I'm still the same way. For example, I prefer my ski jacket to have as many pockets as possible. The more the better. I also prefer my car to have as many compartments as possible, more buttons, more details. When I'd dress Barbie, I would make sure she had a purse and shoes. She had almost as much shoes as she did clothes. And it wasn't because they were shoes, it was because they were details. I like my toes to have flowers on them. I like make food that has lots of obscure ingredients so I have to search for them in the grocery store. I like paperwork. I used to pretend I had a "desk" where I would steal my mom's stapler, pencils, pens, all types of paper, notebooks, drawing utensils, calculator, paper clips, rubber bands and anything else I could find in her office to put on my desk to make me feel important. As a really little kid I would steal things from around the house and hide them in crevices I would find. They were my personal time capsules. It was actually only a few years ago that we got rid of this ancient stove that used to sit as decoration in the corner of our kitchen. Inside my mom found a few barbie clothes, a tinker toy, one of my brothers micromachines, a piece of gum, and her crystal swan that she got in Germany years ago. She told me about this on the phone one day freshman or sophomore year, saying, "Martha, I thought I had lost it. Do you know how much that is worth? Thousands of dollars, you little stinker you." The point is, this movie has details all over it. I loved how the hotel has doors everywhere, and you follow Michael J Fox everywhere, door after door. You see him handle detail after detail. That is my favorite part by far. Then, of course, it's a cute love story, but that comes second to the intricacy of the set.
Last of the Mohicans - awesome soundtrack, awesome fight scenes, beautiful love story, need I say more? This movie scared me to death, but that was because I kept imagining I was one of the girls. Daniel Day Lewis is like the ultimate hero. *sigh
Matrix - Again, cool fight scenes. I like that it juxtaposes a Christ-like figure to these very anti-Christ (used in the popular definition) ideas. Very interesting.
The Recruit - This may sound like a weird choice but I was so entertained with this movie. I remember by the end of the movie, I was breathing hard, ready to jump out of my seat and scream, "what the...did that just happen?!"
Baraka - best. documentary. ever. I own it, and if you ever want to have a life changing experience, let me know and either we can watch it together or you can borrow it. You won't regret it.
Stranger than Fiction - the only Will Ferrel movie that I like, and I happen to love it too. Once again, the cast is amazing, and the themes behind this movie are wonderful too. It addresses the question that all writers have to deal with: what happens when you are writing a story of a character that you love so much you don't want to kill off? And Dustin Hoffman's character answers in the way that every critic will tell you. I loved the characters, the cast who played them, the quaint-ness, the strange-ness
the lovely-ness.

Happy Valentine's Day <3

And that's a wrap.