Tuesday, February 24, 2009

"Your ears should be burning." - Radiohead

I think today was the best day I've ever had in my psych testing class. Here are some of the notes that I took:

-- There was a research study done with kindergartners and the effects of food while taking tests. If the test was an hour or less, the students who ate a snickers bar performed better. If it was much longer than an hour, the students who had a full balanced meal performed better. So, when taking a test for Psych 304, eat a snickers bar.

-- Also, while taking tests, make sure to do them the same way every time. There is something about repetition that helps one recall material. Start out by taking deep breaths. It will help you to focus and slow your heart rate, which is also linked with better test scores. Last but not least, tell yourself reinforcing statements, such as, "So I may not have known that one, but I can still get a 98% -- I can do this." Obviously the worst thing you could do is to freak out after that one question and all the information you tried to retain leaves you.

-- #1 buying habit determiner is the people you're around. This is because of the Drift Effect. Thus, advertising companies just have to look at what people already have in their houses to figure out what they should sell to those people and their neighbors. Way to capitalize on the "Jones's."

-- Humans are exceptionally bad at telling when other humans are lying. Lie detectors are better, but not much better, and people in the special forces really learn how to trick them, one technique in particular is by actually believing the lie. There is an fMRI - like machine (it could actually be an fMRI, I can't remember) that maps your brain. Certain parts light up when they're activated. There is a part of your frontal lobe that is more active when you lie than when you don't, so obviously, when you lie they can tell by this part of your brain being active. It's not perfect, but that is the best lie detector machine we have developed as a human race. When special forces learn to believe the lie, it inhibits just slightly that part of the brain, which is known to be used during times of conflict. If there is no conflict, no need to use it, and so they must not be lying. Interesting.

-- When interviewing, people have a tendency to imitate like the interviewer/interviewee. For example, if your interviewer is upbeat and interested, most likely the interviewee will be too. This is called Social Facilitation. People will generally pick up on other cues to match the same attitude. Moral of this story: Attitude is more important in an interview than the amount of skill you have. If you're a dud, it won't matter that you figured out time travel. The perfect social example that everyone can relate to? Sunday School, according to Dr. Larsen.

-- Direct quote: "Old people are sexually active, and you are sorely mistaken if you thought otherwise." -Dr. Larsen, 10:39 AM MARB Rm 371

--Last but not least, there was trash talk for about 5 min about how Dr. Larsen could beat anyone to ping pong, and he has offered 5 extra credit points to anyone who will try, and 2.5 extra credit points to anyone who will bring food. The tournament is going down this Saturday, and unfortunately I have to work.

Basically, I have the coolest Psych 304 teacher anyone could ask for. And thank goodness too, because man it is really boring learning about everything there is to know about testing sometimes. I sang this song on my way to school today.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

"Paperweight on my back, cover me up like a blanket" - Joshua Radin

I got up late and my choice of clothing suffered for it. Almost all my clothes are in the basket, my closet and drawers are like a barren wasteland with the occasional piece of dead clothing carcasses. (You know, that one shirt you've had for 6 years and haven't worn in 5 and a half.) And so, I was forced to resurrect the dead today. I threw on a pair of pants I haven't worn in ages. Naturally I felt as if I were being judged as not knowing the difference between an acceptable pair of pants and an unacceptable pair of pants as I walked around on campus this week. Let's just get the record straight: I know the difference.

In other news, my Meg got married finally to her beau, Cole. I imagined they'd start a blog of their own like every other newlywed (which they did), start hanging out with only married people (which I'm pretty sure they do), and do other married-like things...like sex. Which by the way, Cole's dad's speech. I almost peed on myself I was laughing so hard, as well as the other 79 guests. And I'll tell you what, I am pretty sure one old lady did as I saw her exit quickly with a look of surprise, shame, and silliness that could not be shaken. When it was my turn to speak, I made sure there were no sexual innuendos.

As for my life updates, I applied to NYU Steinhardt. I would really like to go there, so all 2 of you who read this: pray for my acceptance. I also got accepted to be an EFY counselor this summer for two weeks at Gainsville, GA, which is where I went for two of my four years. I remember nothing but happiness while I was there, and I'm so excited to go back. I will only get to go though if I get accepted to grad school most likely. So pray pray pray. As a back up plan, I went to the career fair and gave out 7 resumes and got 1 job interview on the spot. That was cool. I hear back from them any day now. I guess we'll see. All in all, at least I can do EFY for 2 weeks this summer.

And as crazy as this sounds...I actually want to stay here in Utah, and not just for the summer. Tresa is moving, Ashley is moving (most likely), and a lot of people in my ward...oh, it's just going to be sad. I am not ready for college to be over...am I? My new found friend, Kels H., was saying last night she's going to India this summer, and it made me want to go on another study abroad so bad. I am also going to miss my apartment a lot, I like my set up. Ok, I promise this is the last time I talk about my undecided future.

One of my favorite duets.

Um, I need to re-emphasize this. I AM GOING TO BE AN AUNT!!! :D I can't even believe it. Still. Peter and Lora like the name Rihanna for a girl. I told them I think of a slutty singer every time I hear it, but whatever. I guess it's a cute name, if you just disassociate. Which reminds me, supposedly "cellar door" is the most beautiful sound in the English language, according to J.R. Tolkien. Again, disassociate.

Last but not least, I still remain undefeated at Cranium, thanks to Team Awesome.

*Raise the roof

Friday, February 20, 2009

"Forgoe the parable" - Bon Iver

Character: Lewis Baker.
17 yr. Old white male from somewhere it snows. Lives with grandparents. Grandma is a chain smoker. Gramps is an old rock band drummer who played for the likes of Elvis and eventually The Who for a little while. Lewis has a fascination with Japanese TV (even though he can't understand it), biking everywhere (because he doesn't have a car), sushi (even though he hates it) and the local library (because he thinks the girl who works there is hot). He likes his English class content, but despises his teacher for making him write this assignment. He also has an overactive imagination.

Plot points: Lewis leaves secret admirer notes for library girl, who is quite intrigued. English teacher gives Lewis a C in the class. Lewis is constantly imagining “what if” situations, mostly involving his death.

Setting: Lewis is sitting at his tiny desk in his tiny room with a huge window with those nasty plastic blinds that make the whole room striped with sunlight. He's trying to write his English assignment.

Beginning lines:

I’m staring at a blank page.

There, it’s not so blank anymore.

They tell me to write what I know, but what do I know?

I know I watch Japanese TV online every day from 2 – 4 PM. There’s something about the way the sunshine peeps in through the slits of the blinds that reminds me of the swallowing effect of my room. I’m pretty sure those two facts have nothing to do with each other but nevertheless, they coexist. Also, “Nihongo ga wakede ma sien.”

I know that yesterday this blonde girl in the library asked me if my pants were spandex or jeans. I told her they were a hybrid. From the future.

I know that after the library I went straight to the grocery store on my grandma’s bike listening to For Emma by Bon Iver. My legs turned to the beat. Saw death on a sunny snow, what a line. I saw that too, once. A bird flew right into our garage door, which is opaque? Go figure. Bloody mess all over the snowy sidewalk. I bought her another pack of Marlboro cigs, one of those blue squeeze pops of goo, an apple for after I finished, and some celery for Gram’s stew tonight. Should be delicious. Not.

I know my sad attempts at being Rush’s next drummer are futile, but I still bang on Gramp’s old drum set at about 4:10 PM every day. It usually lasts till 4:15 PM because I suck. But boy those Japanese beats really get me going sometimes.

I know that I will never be a writer because this is hard. What was Mrs. Finkle thinking. Why couldn’t she have asked me to write about the greatest rocks bands of the 80s or better yet, zombies? I know, a love story about two zombies who hunt humans together and play in the radioactive fields of ooze. She-thing would say, “Goodnight freak” and He –thing would say, “Your inner beauty is like a magnet for my soul.” Because let’s face it, She-thing is ugly.

Ending lines:
I laid there, staring at the ceiling imagining what it would be like if it caved in right now. The dry wall, the metal pipes, the dust mites, the asbestos, on display, right now, with me under it. Would I be crushed or suffocate to death or be trapped? Oh well. I turned over, opened the blinds. The dust made me cough. I fell asleep with the orange light in my face.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

"Anna Molly" - Incubus

My creative writing assignment for today. We had to write something in a form that had nothing to do with what we were writing about, just to switch things up. What do you think? Does it work?

Anomaly

Q: And then he was there, ejected from the math building not caring to look up at anyone, particularly me.

A: I couldn't help but stare.

Q: His jagged left shoulder jutted out of his body like an extra appendage.

A: A spider with nine legs.

Q: Appearing to be too heavy, his head hung down covering his right collar bone, showing God the disgraced side of his face.

A: Cauliflower ear down to his chin.

Q: There were eighty-six reasons I knew this boy would not.

A: But in his head, I imagined he discovered time travel, the how of black holes, the why of mankind, the where of heaven.

Q: Survival may be success, but success is not survival.

A: Take that, Darwin.


now watch this video.

Monday, February 16, 2009

I am Jack's ode to Chuck

I am proud to say that Chuck Palahniuk is my favorite author. He's satiric, inventive, wrote Fight Club for heaven's sake. I mean, what kind of person do you have to be to write something so twisted? I have a goal to write something as sick and black and minimalist as him one day. I was doing a little research, and it turns out he's from Oregon. He studied under this guy who teaches to write "dangerously —writing what personally scares or embarrasses you in order to explore and artistically express those fears honestly." If you had to participate, what would you write about? No wonder Chuck is a freak.
This is what Chuck likes to read.
And this is what Chuck has to say about it.
Some other authors who are of the same genre include of course Amy Hempel, Mark Richard, Denis Johnson, Thom Jones, and Bret Easton Ellis. And this is his list of favorites, which is also my graduation reading list starting this summer.

I am Jack's disappointed homophobic daughter.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

"Why are my eyes filling up with these lonely tears" - Wreckless Eric

It was cold and I was in a hurry to get to my next class. I don't know why but for some reason I got to thinking about Darwin and his idea of natural selection. And I realized that human beings are pretty much the only species that don't follow that evolutionary law. In fact, we do everything we can to save even the least of all human beings. Those that are born with all their internal organs on the outside even have a chance where, quite frankly, had that happened to a deer in the wild, it would have been dead immediately. No, we are different. Everyone has a chance. And then I saw him. That poor boy walking out of the math building. He was skinny, his left shoulder jutted out farther than his right, his head hung over his right collar bone, which you couldn't see because his shirt was also hanging on him crookedly. He had his backpack on and what I thought was him just nodding his head weird turned out to be a birth defect. When I got closer I realized the left side of his face was puffed out, and his eye was swollen and his mouth pressed shut as if he was holding himself back from yelling. I felt bad for the guy. I wanted to give him a hug. And then I realized this guy probably didn't have much of a chance of surviving, at least with Darwin's definition.

Valentines Day is on saturday and I am so sick of the commercials and the red and the white and the excessive amount of PDA all of a sudden. Every year I am reminded of how single I am. And every year I do something to avoid that realization. I think my favorite something was when Tresa and I tried to trash Nate's car, only to be busted by the cops, only to be told that it was not registered to a so-called Nate, and that in fact we had trashed the wrong neighbor's car. Thank goodness Celtic's Jacket was in one of my classes and we could laugh about it.

I ran out of gas on Friday coming back from night skiing at Brighton. It was an adventure I'll never forget. And the couple that rescued us had 2 random connections to me and Alex. No where but the state of Utah can you be picked up by total strangers and they know someone you know, I'm convinced.

I think I am starting to get good at my job because on Saturday I taught a kid how to ski while playing Star Wars. As Marth Vader, I seriously forgot I was teaching him, Yoda, how to ski because I was too caught up trying to blast with him my lightning and dodging his lightning. And when I got tipped, I thought to myself that had to have been the easiest fifteen dollars I've ever made. I get paid to imaginate, people.

I finally saw Donnie Darko. Dylan, I saw it for you, man. All through high school you told me what an amazing movie it is, and how I needed to see it. I realize now that you somewhat personify Donnie and Frank. I feel like I understand you a little better now. You should know it's on my top 10 favorites list.

...which I shall delineate now. I feel a little intimidated by the numbers, so I will just ramble 10 movies, in no particular order. Really.
A League of Their Own - this movie is incredible. The whole cast is amazing, especially Tom Hanks, and every time I got sick as a kid my dad would ask me what movie I wanted him to rent for me, and I would always always always request this one. This is my comfort movie, and will forever remind me of the compassion my dad showed me as a kid. Maybe that sounds cheesy, but it's the truth.
Fight Club - holy crap have you seen Brad Pitt's body in this movie? If that wasn't enough, Chuck Palahnuik is an amazing writer and consequently so is this well done on-screen adaptation. Thank's Chuck. And Brad.
Donnie Darko - just saw this movie last night, and it's already made it to the list. How is this possible? If you know anything about me, you'd know I am pretty morbid. This movie is the daughter of morbidity. Creepy, artsy, meaningful, references cool literature and other interesting pieces of work...well done.
Harold and Maude - if Donnie Darko is the daughter of morbidity, this movie is The Grandfather. Gross and hysterical put to the sounds of Cat Stevens.
For Love or Money - this is the second movie I would always always always request from my dad as a kid when I'd get sick. I remember being obsessed with intricate things as a kid, and to some extent, I'm still the same way. For example, I prefer my ski jacket to have as many pockets as possible. The more the better. I also prefer my car to have as many compartments as possible, more buttons, more details. When I'd dress Barbie, I would make sure she had a purse and shoes. She had almost as much shoes as she did clothes. And it wasn't because they were shoes, it was because they were details. I like my toes to have flowers on them. I like make food that has lots of obscure ingredients so I have to search for them in the grocery store. I like paperwork. I used to pretend I had a "desk" where I would steal my mom's stapler, pencils, pens, all types of paper, notebooks, drawing utensils, calculator, paper clips, rubber bands and anything else I could find in her office to put on my desk to make me feel important. As a really little kid I would steal things from around the house and hide them in crevices I would find. They were my personal time capsules. It was actually only a few years ago that we got rid of this ancient stove that used to sit as decoration in the corner of our kitchen. Inside my mom found a few barbie clothes, a tinker toy, one of my brothers micromachines, a piece of gum, and her crystal swan that she got in Germany years ago. She told me about this on the phone one day freshman or sophomore year, saying, "Martha, I thought I had lost it. Do you know how much that is worth? Thousands of dollars, you little stinker you." The point is, this movie has details all over it. I loved how the hotel has doors everywhere, and you follow Michael J Fox everywhere, door after door. You see him handle detail after detail. That is my favorite part by far. Then, of course, it's a cute love story, but that comes second to the intricacy of the set.
Last of the Mohicans - awesome soundtrack, awesome fight scenes, beautiful love story, need I say more? This movie scared me to death, but that was because I kept imagining I was one of the girls. Daniel Day Lewis is like the ultimate hero. *sigh
Matrix - Again, cool fight scenes. I like that it juxtaposes a Christ-like figure to these very anti-Christ (used in the popular definition) ideas. Very interesting.
The Recruit - This may sound like a weird choice but I was so entertained with this movie. I remember by the end of the movie, I was breathing hard, ready to jump out of my seat and scream, "what the...did that just happen?!"
Baraka - best. documentary. ever. I own it, and if you ever want to have a life changing experience, let me know and either we can watch it together or you can borrow it. You won't regret it.
Stranger than Fiction - the only Will Ferrel movie that I like, and I happen to love it too. Once again, the cast is amazing, and the themes behind this movie are wonderful too. It addresses the question that all writers have to deal with: what happens when you are writing a story of a character that you love so much you don't want to kill off? And Dustin Hoffman's character answers in the way that every critic will tell you. I loved the characters, the cast who played them, the quaint-ness, the strange-ness
the lovely-ness.

Happy Valentine's Day <3

And that's a wrap.